This season – and hopefully for a long time to come – it’s all about living the soft life. But what does that even mean? A soft life refers to one that is of good quality and enriching and filled with ease and comfort, without having to make loads of sacrifices that come at the expense of your happiness. And it’s something that homegrown content creator and beauty babe, Kay Yarms, has perfected. “It’s a way of life and really means treating yourself as the main character in your world. Everyone else is just living in it!”

While Instagram has made the soft life look like it’s just about aesthetic soft furnishings and self-care, Kay Yarms says that there’s a lot more to it than fluffy gowns and face masks. “It’s about waking up every morning and deciding that you want the best for yourself, which should reflect in the choices you make, which shouldn’t be made to please others! It’s about ignoring the expectations of others and giving yourself the best life possible with the one opportunity we have.”

Do you want to start living the soft life? Here are Kay Yarms’ six tips to make yourself the main character.

Gown and lingerie from Cotton On

1. Set – and Maintain – Healthy Boundaries

“People can be pushy, which is why having boundaries in place is crucial. This can be challenging, but once you have learned how to be firm and stick to it, it will prevent other people and their plans from taking over your life. After all, we can’t control other people’s actions but we can control how we react to them.”

Dress from Kat van Duinen and earrings from Avanglion SA

2. Create a Routine that Works for You

“Anyone who knows me knows that I prioritise my sleep – I talk about it a lot! Something that has contributed to my soft life is having a routine that suits me. I go to bed early and wake up early, too. This gives me more waking hours to get in some yoga, watch a sermon, do my makeup and get myself prepared for the busy day ahead.”

Suit from Cotton On, hat from Crystal Birch and scarf from Dreamland Vintage

3. Carve Out Time for Yourself

“Sometimes, when I feel a bit sad or empty, I just need to go home, get into the bathtub and relax. Other ways I like to treat myself are by watching a movie in my PJs, cooking a meal or really spending time on my elaborate skincare routine. Sometimes just allowing myself to sleep in longer is all it takes to get me feeling back on track.”

We could *all* do with some more confidence! Click here for local star, Mihlali Ndamase’s, top tips.

Hat from Crystal Birch and dress from Style Rotate

4. Make Downtime a Priority

“Being in the public eye means I have a lot of people trying to get my attention 24 hours a day and thinking that they have unlimited access to me. And a girl needs some time off! This is why I have no problem putting my phone into ‘Do Not Disturb’ mode if I don’t feel like talking to anyone and need some time alone.”

Pyjama set from Top Drawer

5. Work Hard – But Take Plenty of Breaks

“With my career, I get to control when I work and when I don’t. But before, I was working non-stop to the point of burnout. This is when I learned the importance of taking a break. And this can be breaks taken during the work day or a longer holiday. Both are important so that you have a healthy work-life balance and help me to be more creative and productive.”

Top and pearls from SIAGI, pyjama set from Cotton On

6. Do More of What Fulfils You

“It’s really important to always ask yourself in any situation: is this pouring into my cup or taking out of it? Always make the time to do things that you feel nourish your and your spirit. You also can’t perform at your peak or be a support to those around you if your cup is depleted, so make sure you keep yours full!”

Want to manifest the life you deserve? Click here for Thabsie's 7 tips to make it happen!